Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Tragedy in Tucson inspires this blog

Tonight I just watched President Obama talk at the memorial service in Tucson. I was one of many who was inspired by his message. Although critics are busily discussing and evaluating each moment in that speech, it was, for sure, an eloquent and heart felt message in my opinion which has led me to write a blog on how it impacted me and my current need for prayer.

Since my diagnosis in October, I have talked about many of the spiritual changes I have experienced and never have I prayed that my cancer would be taken away. I have simply prayed that I have the time needed to become a better christian and be given the opportunity to be a steward of the love that I have been given by all of you. That continues to be my prayer and I am forever greatful to all of you who continue to include me in your thoughts and prayers as I know that this is a large part of my stewardship which is bringing all of you closer to God. Each time any of us responds and helps another, we are answering that call.

As time passes I continue to search for my life purpose even though I know that education has been that pupose my entire life. I love children and I love learning. I have never felt that I was the most intellectual when it came to knowledge per say but I always felt and believed that I made up for what I lacked in knowledge with my ability to walk in a childs shoes and to see alternative approaches to address their needs.

As I continued my career, I've seen many teachers who did not have that ability. I think that Obama's message should touch each of us as we look at what we do and how we live each day. I feel like the message he is giving us through scripture is to look past evil, for evil is evident but that we have the power, each of us, to eliminate some of the evil in the world. Each of us has the power to impact another individual and those opportunities happen constantly throughout each and every day. As a teacher I know that we have the power to impact a child, to make them stronger or weaker with a single word. We take that power for granted at times. As I listened to Obama, it came to mind that this sick person who was able to kill others for no apparent reason may not have been touched often enough in a positive way. He looks scarey which would cause many to stay away and yet I wonder tonight, if I might have crossed his path and not noticed. I am so much more aware of everyone and everything around me now.

I have so much more knowledge today regarding education than I had 30 plus years ago when I began teaching and there is still time for me to do something with that knowledge that will impact future generations. I pray that I am given the time to formulate those ideas and share them with others in some way so I can continue to make a difference. In the meantime, I smile and say hello to everyone I see in the hopes that it will brighten their day.

Someone told me that we are ALL TERMINAL! From the day we are born we have no idea of when we will die. Some are given the blessing of knowing that this time may or may not be nearing which is the blessing that I have been given. This is a blessing because once I was faced with the news of my diagnosis it put the end in sight which catapulted me to a new level of spiritual awareness. I have much to learn with my faith but I do know this, my diagnosis makes no difference which is why I refuse to focus on it because even if I am miraculously cured of this disease, another will follow as once again, we are ALL TERMINAL. I choose to focus on the impact I can make today and every day until that time comes when I am no longer on this earth.

I continue to be at peace and to keep my eyes, ears, and my heart open to the messages that seem to touch me daily. I wish the same for all of you. Love and prayers. Susan

Sunday, January 2, 2011

A New Year

As we begin a New Year, I am hopeful that I will continue to feel the blessings that I have so learned to appreciate for these past few months. It is strange but I am not focused on cancer at all. I know that something significant has invaded my often times chaotic life but I feel great and so relaxed. I wish that I could impact everyone and share in this gift as I really feel changed and so much more relaxed. I do not have the same level of stress and each day I awake happy to be alive and feeling well. I can't imagine that this feeling will ever go away as it seems to be the most important thing in my life.

We take our health for granted and often times even wish that we didn't have to go on but in reality, when faced with that possibility, we really do want to stick around as long as possible. I am lucky to get the opportunity to see what it feels like to know that I might not be around forever but I have news, none of us will! Please take time each day to pray and be mindful of your own gifts and blessings. None of us should be wasting time dealing with the small things. We all need to enjoy ourselves, our family and our friends. Given that, call someone and make plans to have lunch, make a special dinner for your family, smile at a stranger, or just take a deep breath and enjoy a cup of coffee and the birds outside. I love you all and continue to feel good. Susan